Sorry that things have been rather slow on this blog of late. It hasn’t been my intention to remain silent.
I recently read an entry on another ‘blog – one to do with so-called “online dating, of all things -about couples giving each other the “silent treatment”, in which either or both partners actually send messages that they wish the other were not there.
This kind of silence is very dangerous when it comes to considering the lives of people with disabilities. Not listening or communicating to us in ways that respect our worthiness and ability to contribute so society, seems to tell us that it would be better were we not there.
How do you experience this type of silence and how does it affect your sense of being wanted, respected or treated as worthwhile?
I often get the impression that (some) others would prefer me to make “small talk” and that if I won’t do that then they’d prefer me to shut up altogether. This leads me to conclude that they don’t value my opinion on serious subjects and/or that they want to live in ignorance of the realities of life as experienced by anyone else but themselves. At times this makes me angry and defiant, all the more determined to speak and break the silence, but at other times this makes me withdraw from society. Either way, I feel that there is no genuine communication, that I’d get more attention if I were a dog or cat, and that nobody cares what I think or feel.
Your remind me of the saying: Love me or hate me, but don’t ignore me! It’s true: we can each deal to greater or lesser degrees with how others perceive us, but ‘the wall of silence’ can be really destructive.
great bolgs Daniel. Keep upt he good work!